Happy New Year, jellicle readers!
I couldn’t let the day end without having a write-up. I’ve been very complacent lately. Ngayon lang ako nakapag-leave ng ganitong katagal: Simula noong Pasko hanggang ngayon – last day bukas.
Sa Martes, back to normal na ko uli.
Masarap pala ang nakabakasyon. Yung walang ginagawa. Yung walang iniisip. Puro pasarap lang.
Minsan, nakaka-refresh din. Nakaka-walang-haggard.
The vacation also gave me a chance to reflect on the year that was. Kung sinubaybayan n’yo ang mga kwento ko sa nagdaang taon, you’d agree when I say that it was a roller-coaster ride. Maraming mga nangyari, lalo na sa love life. Karamihan ay dahil sa ginusto ko rin.
Bago pa man magsimula ang 2011, sinabihan na ako ni Danes, na hindi para sa aming mga Snakes ang taon. Malulugi kami, malulungkot, babagsak. Ayon daw kasi sa Chinese horoscope, hindi raw kasi compatible ang Kuneho at ang Ahas.
Kaya kahit pa-paano, hindi na ako nagulat.
Lumubog ako sa utang. Malaking utang. Hanggang ngayon ay hindi ko pa alam kung pa-paano babayaran. Noong araw, sinasampal ko si Domeng ng pera. Ngayon, sa kanya na ako nang-hihiram.
Ganon. Kalerki, ano?
Nagkahiwalay kami ni Syme. Matapos ang walong taong pagtitiis n’ya sa akin, iniwan ko pa rin siya. Sinaktan. Binalewala. In my hopes be free and see the world, wala akong ibang inisip kundi ang kaligayahan ko.
Hindi siya gumanti. Sinarili lang n’ya. Wala akong sumbat na narinig.
Ako? Nagpakasaya ako.
And I was happy. Oh yes, happy for a time. The Rabbit had had a few happy surprises for the Snake. Dalawang beses akong nagpakasaya.
But all were just for a time.
Sa pangalawa, dumating si Karma.
And the rest, was 2011 history.
Yes, dear readers, malala ang naging depression ko. It will be no use denying it. After a few jumps, the Rabbit hopped away with the only possible happiness that I could have had last year.
But I gained new friends, and found out who the real ones are. In the end, si Syme pa rin ang tinakbuhan ko: hindi para makipag-balikan, kundi para makahanap ng iiyakan during long weekends and sleepless nights.
Ang sama ko diba? But he silently swallowed everything. Kung sumama man ang loob n’ya, hindi na n’ya ipinaramdam sa akin.
The least I can do for him is to write and give him credit for helping me go through those dark times.
Thank you, Syme! I owe you, big time!
If there’s one thing that I learned from the past year, it is to control my hyperactive mind and really-really think about my decisions before giving in.
Just for the record, masaya na ako. I haven’t been seeing Lungkot these past months.
But the Rabbit also had a few treats.
First was Caredivas! For the longest time, I haven’t had a musical to go ga-ga about. Caredivas was heaven’s gift to the theater-lover in me.
Also were my travels. Like before, I met a lot of friends. I had more time with Jary, who has been one great co-worker.
Another, was the number of ULP achievements this year. We’re vying for another BPO Award this year. Amazingly, Jary and I have been getting favorable reviews from BPA\P and CCAP for our initiatives.
Next was the opportunity to join a Book Club. I was a part of Flipper’s book discussion of Susan Hill’s THE WOMAN IN BLACK.
Ang saya nila! Ang dami din nila.
Isa pa, ay ang walang tigil kong pagbabasa. I managed to account all the books I have read last year (kasama na rin ang mga academic books and non-fiction). 134. Oh yes! I was able to beat my goal of 120 books for 2011!
At higit sa lahat, pumayat ako. Alam n’yo na siguro yan. Pero para doon sa mga ayaw pa ring maniwala, eto ang ebidensya.
Narito ang picture ko with Vanessa from our last December reunion in 2010.
This was 41 pounds ago.
Early last year, I started the South Beach Diet again. I needed to lose weight. Tumatanda na ako’t ayoko nang abutin ng di pagbalik sa gusto kong timbang. Oo, masarap kumain, pero mas masarap ang may self-esteem.
Nag-enroll na rin ako sa gym. Sa Fitness First, sa RCBC. May kamahalan, but the location is very convenient. Isang tawiran lang. Also, dahil nga Platinum ang membership, pwede akong pumunta doon na sapatos lang ang dala ko. Lahat sagot na nila. Toiletries, damit…pati mga boys. (Sabeeeh?!)
Yesterday, Vanessa, together with the boys, went to MOA with me. Vanessa suggested we take another picture again. One-year-after photo kumbaga.
Eto ang resulta.
May mga bagay din na surprising. Noong nagkahiwalay kami ni Syme, matagal kaming hindi nakapag-usap. Nag-enjoy ako sa sarili ko, habang nag-explore siya ng mga bagay na matagal na n’yang gustong gawin.
Isa na dito ang magkaroon ng sariling billboard sa EDSA.
It has been there in front of SM North for quite sometime, but he hadn’t told me about it until recently. Kung kelan na-pull-down na. Nakakahiya daw kasi. Though dream n’ya ang maging modelo, hindi naman daw n’ya pinangarap na ngarag-mudil ang kahahantungan n’ya.
Sinabi ko na lang, na damang dama ko ang energy ng character. Kuhang-kuha ko agad ang konsepto at dating. Sinabi ko na lang, na magaling siyang mag-project, na talented siya.
Besides, hindi lahat ng gwapo sa Pilipinas ay nabibigyan ng break. Much more a huge billboard in EDSA. Shet!
But just for the record, I have never been so proud of him. Siya na talaga!!! Siyang-siya na – a MUDIL!
Despite the lows that I have gone through the past year, I still can’t help thanking those that have helped me get through all those troubled times. Friends, families and collegues were there to help me get back to my feet again.
Kagabi, while waiting for the clock to strike 12, I was lying on the couch, thinking what is it with New Year’s Eves. Some people, especially those that have developed the habit of reflecting, would review the things that they have gone through the past months and recollect. There’s a certain type of nostalgia, a feeling that affectionately claws down the hearts of men.
Now I understand. With my highs and lows of the previous year, I can’t help but wonder, what’s in store for me this time. New Years and their Eves give us moments to stop and think and thank and celebrate the year that was, and nervously anticipate what is to come.
Moving forward na tayo ulit. Bukas, luluhod ang mga tala.
PS. Oo nga pala, the year of the Dragon, according to the Chinese calendar, fairly works well with the Snake. At least OK na kahit pa-paano.
Next chapter please!
Happy New Year, ulit, dear readers!!! Mehal ko keyong lehet!