close
schoolbus

“Good morning everyone,” pinatong ng teacher namin ang mga gamit n’ya sa lumang desk sa harapan ng klase. “My name is Prof. Bala (real name). My middle name is Cinco (real middle name din). Welcome to Contrastive Analysis. This is a highly theoretical subject for your Master’s Degree. So you better start treating this seriously…”

Napalunok ako.

“…or else, you’ll be getting Five Bullets from me!” sinabi n’yang nakangiti.

Nagtawanan na kaming lahat. Marunong din palang magbiro si Ma’am. Hindi ko siya naging teacher noong college ako sa PNU, pero madalas ko siyang makabungguan. Hindi ako sure kung kilala n’ya ako, pero wala na sa akin ‘un. Ang mahalaga, teacher ko na siya ngayon.

“I have actually retired last year,” she said with matching taas ng kilay. “But I decided to continue on teaching, as long as my feet will allow me.”

Napangiti naman ako. Buti na lang, sa kanya ako napa-enrol.

PNU Graduate School 2nd Sem Enrollment (2010)

Hindi biro ang enrollment namin noong isang linggo. Ilang libong tao ang dumagsa sa PNU, at pumila ng sabay-sabay, tumanga ng sabay-sabay, nagutom ng sabay-sabay at nagreklamo ng sabay-sabay. Nasira kasi ang system gamit sa pag-papa-enlist, kaya na-puno ang mga taong naghihintay hanggang sa umabot ng mahigit isang libo.

Ako, umuwi na lang ako. Alas tres na kasi ng hapon, at nasa dulo pa ko ng pila. Imposible namang umabot pa ko sa assessment ng alas-cinco. Sa mga sumunod na araw na lang ako nag-pa-assess at nagbayad, pero kahit anung late mo, mahaba pa rin ang mga pila.

“Now, for your first writing activity, I’d like you to write something about yourself,” sabi sa amin ni Five Bullets na nakangiti pa rin.

Kumunot ang kilay ko nang hindi ko napipigilan. Ano kami Grade 3?

“Where do we write it Ma’am?” tanong ko.

“Sa palad mo!” sagot agad n’ya. Pero biglang-bawi. “Siempre sa papel! Alangan namang sa palad mo.”

Napanga-nga ako. Witty si Ma’am.

And so we did what we were told. Silently, we pulled our yellow pads and started writing, habang si Ma’am Five Bullets, naupo katabi ng advisee n’ya. Tahimik rin silang nag-uusap habang isa-isang binubuklat ang paper ng bata.

“What a good way to start,” bulong ko kay Rechelle.

“Wag ka nang kumontra.” Nakakalahati na siya. “Kung magfo-focus ka na lang, siguro patapos ka na ngayon.”

“Anung kasunod nito?” Talagang hindi pa nawawala sa isip ko ang tactics ni Ma’am. “What I did last sem break?

“Magsulat ka na nga lang!”

“I just don’t see how this is related to a highly theoretical subject!”

Next subject, Philosophical Foundations of Education. Hindi ko matanggap na kukunin ko na naman ‘to – for the 3rd f*#king time! Pero sige lang. Requirement ‘e.

Pumasok si Prof. Ma-El (hindi totoong pangalan, pero ka-sounds-like). Malaking lalaki, nakasalamin, at konti na lang ang natitirang bangs. Tumayo sa likod ng klase at pinatayo kaming lahat.

“Let’s pray. Glory be to the Father and to the….”

Nakisunod na lang ako. Ilang taon na rin akong hindi nagdasal bago magsimula ang klase. Ang huli ko pa yata ay noong 1997 sa Letran, kung saan halos tapusin ang rosario bago magsimula sa Motivation ang mga teachers.

Pagkaupo namin, nagsimula na agad si Prof Ma-El sa una n’yang tanong.

“What are the 3 operational processes on which the mind works?”

Nakatanga kami. Oo, mga graduate students kami, pero kaya kami nag-aaral ay para malaman ang mga bagay na wala pa sa mga utak namin.

Walang nag-taas ng kamay.

“What is existence? How can you say that you are, if you are?”

Tanga ulit.

Tumanga rin siya.

“How do you know that you know?”

I don’t know. Really.

“You, gentleman,” turo n’ya sa akin. “How do you know that you know?”

“Sir, as far as I know, you still do not know our names. Because you will only know us, especially me – that I am not a gentleman, if you start by getting our class cards with our names on it.”

Tumingin sa akin si Prof. Ma-El. Matagal akong tinitigan. Nagtitingan kami. Siya, expressionless. Ako, nakangiti. Mahirap nang mapag-initan sa unang araw ng klase.

“You know a good point. Sige. Pass your registration forms and class cards, before we begin the science of knowing.”

Oh I don’t wanna know, sabi ng isip ko. As far as I know, gusto ko nang matulog.

Pagkakolekta ni Sir Ma-El ng mga documents namin, bumalik na siya ulit sa diskurso ng pagka-alam.

Dumami ang mga tanong, at humaba ang diskurso. Nawala ka kaming lahat. Lalo na ako. Alas-cinco ng umaga pa’y gising na ‘ko at halos alas-3 na. Antok na antok na ako.

Napunta ang usapan sa “existence.” Kung bakit na-kunekta ni Ma-El ‘un sa “knowing,” ay hindi ko alam.

Sa mga sumunod na oras, nagpalunod na lang ako sa stream of consciousness. Antok na talaga ko. Bigla kong na-miss ang kama ko.

(Read at your own risk)

“Can you Flordeliza, disappear from this room? If I wish to have food on the table, by the flick of the hand, will I get it?…(No sir)…BUT I AM BOSS! Why can’t I not boss the food?….Can this classcard, instantly become an ash? (No sir)…And the process by which it must go through to become an ash, how can it happen? (Silence)…How can these classcards reach it’s maximum ashness?…(Silence ulit) THUS IF I WANT FOOD, then I have to cause the series of processes and changes that will result into having food. That means that I have to cook the food, serve it, and bring it here, and present it here in the table. And you have instant “having.” CAN YOU TEACH A KINDERGARTEN student Quantum Mechanics or Shakespeare Drama? Why? Why?! Because?….(Because they will not appreciate it. It is still beyond their level of knowledge, sir.) The potency of the mind of a child has not reached yet the level of processing these ideas…..AND what do you call, a teacher, who teaches a kindergarden class with Shakespeare drama….? And if I teach that kindergarten with such ideas, whose fault is it….? (The teacher sir….) AND IF I put myself on the other side, and the other side does not follow, whose fault is it….? (The teacher) Why….? Because it is not the nature of the pupils to move to where you are!…..But if you are in front of the mirror and the image in the mirror doesn’t move, whose fault is it…..? (Hahahahahaha! You!)….Of course! THUS, the mind must agree with reality….THUS it is what we call the supremacy of existence. Meaning, reality will not follow the wishes of the mind….It should be your mind or your intellect that should accept reality…..You are thirsty, and there is a liquid there, a bottle of muriatic acid, and you told yourself, that if I drink this bottle of liquid, I will be able to quench my thirst. And you drink it, what will happen…..? (We will die). Of course, because you did not RESPECT reality! THUS REALITY IS NOT SUBJECT TO OUR WHIMS, CAPRICE OR WISHES…OR BELIEFS…..

Unti-unting nawawala ang antok ko.

“…Now, Madam, are you a girl? (Yes sir)…How can you say that you are a girl? (Because my nature is a girl). And what tells you that your nature is a girl…? Hmmmm….? What tells you that your nature is that of a girl and not a boy….? Hmmmm…..? Because you have body parts that shows that you are a girl!”

Natapos ang klase ni Prof. Ma-El na pagod ang isip namin kakaisip kung babae ba kami o lalake. Ako naman, lalong na-confuse sa gender ko.

Pero kahit papano, may isa akong natutunan sa unang klase n’ya. Na hindi talaga pwedeng sumunod ang realidad sa isip mo.

“Sir Orly,” tawag sa akin ni Rita pagkalabas ko sa Quadrangle. “Un palang ipinasulat sa atin ni Ma’am Five Bullets kanina, i-ta-transcribe natin sa I.P.A!

Napanga-nga ako. “Ano? Hindi pa pala tapos ‘un?”

“Ipapasa sa Finals!”

“Putek!”

“Well, nautakan ka ni Ma’am!” sagot ni Rechelle. “Ano ka ngayon?”

Napakamot na lang ako sa ulo.

Tags : contrastive analysisfoundations of educationgraduate schoolPNUpnu-eltstudies
Orly S. Agawin

The author Orly S. Agawin

Orly has been writing for The Jellicle Blog since 2008. He is a training and development consultant by day and an art enthusiast by night. He lives in Parañaque with his mom.

Leave a Response


Warning: Cannot assign an empty string to a string offset in /home/jellicle/public_html/wp-includes/class.wp-scripts.php on line 426

Warning: Cannot assign an empty string to a string offset in /home/jellicle/public_html/wp-includes/class.wp-scripts.php on line 426